Wednesday, December 7, 2016

AIN'T LIFE GRAND - AN IWSG POST



It’s IWSG Day and I’m late getting my post up. Not surprised, are you? LET ME EXPLAIN!


By way of explanation I’m going to talk a little bit about myself (something I am normally loathe to do). I have an autoimmune disease. This means that my immune system has decided (by some freak of nature) the some of my organs are the enemy and it regularly attacks them; namely my thyroid and kidneys. My poor kidneys are already in a weakened condition, so it is an extreme concern to keep the ole immune system as happy as possible, so it’s lays off of em. On top of that I suffer from Fibromyalgia, most likely brought on by severe nerve damage as a result of chemotherapy (yes, I’m also a cancer survivor). Because of the aforementioned conditions I suffer from chronic pain and fatigue. Some days, like today for example, I have to lay down for a little bit after taking a shower, I’m that worn out by the activity (ain’t life grand).


These conditions are exacerbated by a  host of things that occur for most of us in the normal routine of life; like stress, over-activity, anxiety, the common cold, and changes in the weather (just to name a few). Yesterday was a day from hell for me, and a perfect storm for my unfortunate physiology. Top that off by the fact that today the weather is changing and storms are moving in. Yeah, today is not one of my happier days.


I don’t like to talk about this for a number of reasons, I try to remain positive, not giving into the pain, fatigue, or the fact that there is no cure for my problems. I can do certain things to control it, but some things are simply not with in my realm. I don’t like to complain or appear weak. Nobody likes a whiner. I suppose I also harbor the belief that by not talking about this, it will somehow go away. I know, I know; classic denial.  


Anyway…why am I telling you all of this personal carp today, well it plays directly into the reasons why I write and how I look at the future. Today’s question for the December IWSG is:


In terms of your writing career, where do you see yourself five years from now, and what’s your plan to get there?


First, let me tell you that I write for myself. Oh yeah, I hope that someone else will enjoy my stories and want to get lost in them, but that is always, Always, ALWAYS, SECONDARY. You see, I write to outrun the pain, to catch up with the pain, to endure the pain, to forget about the pain, and ultimately to learn to live with it. Because of my constant companion I normally don’t look too far into the future. Many days, my main concern is getting through that particular one with as much grace and optimism as possible. Days like today, I’m working on it hour by hour.


As to whether or not I actually have a writing career, who knows? But I do know one thing for sure and that is that I will keep writing, keep running (at least figuratively), and keep hoping. For all good things are possible with God, and He too is my constant companion.


Now, I hope this post wasn’t too much of a downer. The last thing I want is pity or undue attention from anyone because of my condition. Perhaps is prove to have been good for me to talk openly about this. You never know. Please hop around to other participants where I’m sure you’ll find more uplifting and informative posts than what I’ve had to say here. Please, stop by and thank Mr. Alec J. Cavanaugh (find him HERE) and his co-hosts for the inspiration behind the IWSG (find the list and more information HERE), and no matter what the future holds for any of us NEVER GIVE UP ON YOUR WRITING OR YOUR DREAMS.


26 comments:

  1. It sounds to me like you... [Link:] "NEED A COLD MOJITO"!

    At least you're still dreaming of a potential writing career. My dream of that crashed and burned.

    Now I just dream of... [Link:] "A COLD MOJITO".

    ~ D-FensDogG
    'Loyal American Underground'

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    1. Thanks, I really needed that Cold Mojito! I also appreciate you stopping by and leaving a comment, especially when I know this writerly stuffs isn't your thing.

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  2. That's a lot for one body to fight. If writing helps you do it, then never stop. And who knows? Maybe one day many others will be enjoying what you've written.

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    1. I can only hope. Thanks for the encouragement.

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  3. And you're such a good writer too.

    "I write to outrun the pain, to catch up with the pain, to endure the pain, to forget about the pain, and ultimately to learn to live with it." *hugs*

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  4. Writing for yourself is lovely. We're always are most strict critics, so if we can give ourselves a pass, then perhaps others will, too. You've had quite an uphill battle with pain, and I'm glad you've found writing to help you through the roughest times.

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    1. Thanks C Lee. writing does help and the encouragement of friends just a great big plus.

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  5. With all you've got going on in your body, it's a wonder you can write. I hope you'll share your writing. Since it helps you, perhaps it will help others. Hugs.

    Merry Christmas and Happy Holidays to you and your family.
    December co-host

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    1. Thanks Diane, Merry Christmas to you also. Writing normally isn't too hard, except for the times when the fibro attacks my hands.

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  6. You can have a life, or an existence. Life costs more, hurts more and is worth more. And writing is definitely a part of your life, and probably integral to who you are. Yay you.

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    1. Thank you EC, that was very eloquently put.

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  7. I empathize with your condition and your desire not to make any post all about you. It's hard to discuss our ills but it's what's happening in our lives that make us the writer we are or become. Good luck with all your goals, health and writing!

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    1. Thanks Yolanda, I appreciate those sentiments. I suppose sometimes it's healthy to spill your guts. I hope I don't start to make a habit of it.

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  8. Ugg to nerve crap, surely isn't a fun thing indeed. If I wasn't a stubborn sob I'd be dead. Thankfully being stubborn and sticking to my routine and using ozone helps. The right routine can make all the difference, as long as those dumb perfect storms don't come along, and with writing a part of it, keep on keeping on indeed.

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    1. You are so right about routine. I take a lot of supplements. don't believe in pharmaceuticals (that's a lot of what got me into trouble in the first place - chemotherapy) and normally I can keep a pretty tight lid on the pain, but when too many things combine, I run into that 'perfect storm' senario and I'm in trouble. A trip to Disneyland with the family at Thanksgiving had me overdoing it, then with my rotten immune system, and contact with all those people, I came home with a bad cold, top that off with two very stressful situations and WHAMO-O I was down for the count. I am feeling better today and between posting this yesterday and visiting other blogs and commenting today, I got some writing in. I do intend to keep on keeping on, no matter the cost.

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  9. Readers can always tell when you write for yourself and when you just write generically for an audience. No one likes pandering. Writing for yourself is definitely the way to go. Your body may be putting up a fight, but as long as it doesn't try to start rejecting your brain (mine does that often), you're still on the right path!

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    1. Ha, ha, ha! You are so right about that brain thing, between something called 'fibro fog' where it's hard to concentrate, the delusions of extreme pain, and my normal dumb blondeness, some days are worse than others. When I'm aware that's happening, I usually lock myself away from view and try to work through it, but sometimes you will notice my comments don't make much sense...well know you know.

      I her what you're saying about being genuine. People know the difference and you can only fool em for so long.

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  10. This wasn't really a downer--kind of optimistic under the circumstances I'd say. It's bad about your health situation, but at least you are facing the realities and not giving up. I do relate to that chronic fatigue--I usually take 2 or 3 brief naps per day (sometimes longer naps)--but according to my recent doctor visit I'm in pretty decent health so I can thank the good Lord for that.

    Keep at that writing and keep looking ahead. Things can always get worse, but it's not something any of us should want to plan on happening.

    Arlee Bird
    Tossing It Out

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    1. I wish I could nap. Unless I'm really, Really, REALLY
      sick I am simply not able to nap. If I should force myself to take a nap, I'm useless the rest of the day and might as well stay in bed until morning.

      I try to remain optimistic. I've already been to the 'things can get worse place', and have no intention of returning.

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  11. To be honest, publishing can come second. Writing for yourself is most important.

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  12. This is the second post today where I've read that writers are writing what they want to write and want to read. That is refreshing. Your passion then comes through.
    I'm so sorry for your health problems and the pain that goes with it. It's good to share with fellow bloggers occasionally. I, for one, am glad I read this post. Go with God. I hope your future prospects improve. Thinking of you. :-)

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    1. Thanks Denise. I really appreciated this comment. I sure do hope my passion comes through. I do at least try.

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  13. I write as a hobbie; so I guess its the same as saying "write for myself." To me anyways.

    Hope you are feeling better by now FAE. Last time I came through your area I got stuck for over an hour in the pass. Lucky me my car has AWD and great tires and I had an easier time than most in the storm. Whew!!

    Feel better Dear. Merry Christmas and Happy New Year.

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