In one of my Battle of the Bands posts I took some heat
over calling my regular readers traditionalists because of the way they voted.
I was called unkind. That started me to thinking (always a dangerous endeavour)
and it also started the above song running through my head.
So, I’m wondering what’s so bad about TRADITION or
being a TRADITIONALIST (I consider myself one, although maybe not exactly where
my musical tastes run)? What’s wrong with thinking that there are traditional
roles that are ordained by a higher power for men and women?
Now, before you grab the torch and pitchfork or decide
to burn your bra on my doorstep, think about some of the problems in the world
today. Could they be avoided if mom was in the home more often? Might most
children be better off in a two parent family? Could our schools be better with
more parent involvement or if as I personally believe, more children were home
schooled?
I mean what’s more important to the well being of the
family…X-Box 2000(put your credit card away; I don’t think they’re actually
making that one yet), a 2,000+ sq. ft. house, the latest model BMW, OR both
parents in the home paying attention the their children, instilling their
values and being the prime role model.
As we are swiftly approaching the holiday season, I’m
reminded of all the traditions that were prevalent just a few short years ago
that have been snatched from our lives by those who are so easily offended by
EVERYTHING. Is it so hard to look the other way at my long running holiday
traditions? Now a lot of you are probably thinking that I’m confusing TRADITION
with RELIGION, but let’s face it, especially to the non-believers, religion is
little more than tradition, unless of course, they want to use it as a weapon
against the believers.
As Tevye tells us, in his little corner of the world,
Anatevka, Russia, the people are all like fiddlers on a roof...sounds crazy,
no? They are just trying to scratch out a pleasant simple tune without breaking
their necks. How do they keep their balance…TRADITION? And, because of their traditions they know
who they are and what God expects them to do.
Perhaps that’s the problem in a nutshell. So many of
our TRADITIONS have gone by the wayside we no longer know who we are.
I know this is not my usual type of post. If you’re
shocked maybe you really don’t ‘know me’.
So, tell me what are some of your favorite traditions. Do
you have any that have gone by the wayside, due to conditions in the world
today? What are you doing about it?
Tend to move with the times
ReplyDeleteYou'll get no argument from me.
ReplyDeleteMy wife and I always have dinner together. Yes, it's often in front of the television, but we do take time to talk and discuss our day and anything else going on in our lives. I think that's a tradition that has been lost that would benefit a lot of families.
As much as tradition has been left in the dust, so has balance. It seems like I constantly hear and read about people struggling to find the balance in their lives. I know that it has been a problem for me over the years.
ReplyDeleteI do think throwing out tradition is responsible for many of our woes. We have gone from it being unheard of for an unmarried woman to have a child out of wedlock to it somehow being the rage. Everyone is doing it. But is that best for the child? The mother? The father not being in the picture? Where is the balance? We have gone from spurning a person who made a mistake and got pregnant to embracing something that isn't actually good for society. In other words one end of the pendulum to the other. Things will only get better when the balance is found.
Great post. There is plenty to chew on here.
Yep, just gone way way down hill. All that crap like big houses and such is not needed. It's stupid. Don't even get me started on those idiots that whine stuff at christmas offends them. They don't like it, shut the hell up lol
ReplyDeleteFAE ~
ReplyDeleteOh, you finally got it posted - GREAT! I'll be back to read it after work tonight (about 7 AM or so). Gotta shower and go now though.
~ D-FensDogg
'Loyal American Underground'
I absolutely agree. Everyone needs some honored traditions in their life. It helps anchor them to their history, family, and society.
ReplyDeleteBut tradition shouldn't necessarily be a goal in itself because it can lead to blind ritual where the only meaning has devolved into, "but that's just the way we've always done it."
Understanding WHY you follow tradition is much more important than the tradition itself.
I definitely agree with you that time spent with your kids is WAY more important to money spent on them. It's the memories parents create for their children that are important.
ReplyDeleteI think traditions are important too. They bring a sense of continuity and belonging to a group. But I also think traditions can and should change over time. What was appropriate say a hundred years ago, probably wouldn't work today.
We can create traditions as we need them. My husband and I, having no children, have several traditions that have evolved around the holidays that work for us. And they have changed to include another couple. The four of us have created a new set of traditions that bring joy. Would they work for someone else? Probably not, but it doesn't matter.
It's okay to move away from certain traditions to make your own, but I hate that the old traditions are labeled as bad. Like if a woman gets married and stays home with her kid, she's looked down on. So instead she's encouraged to get a 60 hour a week job and leave her kid to be raised by an overpriced daycare service.
ReplyDeleteMy wife is training to become a doctor, and we've both discussed that she would be away from the house a lot but she'd also make plenty of money for the two of us. So I'll more than likely be the stay at home writer dad.
So you see, we'll be making our own tradition, but it still WILL be traditional. No nanny/daycare is raising a son or daughter of mine.
wOW! These are some exceptional comments.
ReplyDeleteHoly Ghost - Everyone has to make their own way.
Alex - Certainly a worthy tradition that has gone by the wayside in too many families, especially where there are no children in the home. Good for you.
Robin - the situation you cite is just one of many areas where society and cultural practices have gotten way out of control. Balance is certainly important, but from the beginning of time it has been the goal of the father of all lies to knock EVERYTHING out of balance causing confusion and leading us far from our purpose. If we personally 'know who we are and what God expects of us', we can individually keep our balance in a world gone topsy turvy.
Pat - I' glad you agree.
STMc - I'll be looking towards it.
Chris - Good point. Blind ritual because 'this is the way we have always done it' is not true tradition and pretty meaningless. The WHY is what gives it meaning.
Bish nd Beer boys - What each of you has expressed deals with adaptation of traditions, values and standards. I think that adapting to fit your personal needs is important as long as you keep your priorities in order. You guys seems to have that under control.
Traditions are essential! I am all for people creating their own. But I also miss the times when more of us celebrated the same ones. (Here's a little something that never happens anymore: when I was a kid and we only had three TV channels, we kids eagerly anticipated the time every year when the holiday cartoon shows came on like Charlie Brown's The Great Pumpkin and of course all of the Christmas shows. We'd anticipate them and quote lines from them the next day. That never happens anymore.) And as it turns out, over at Swagger Writers today we are being unPC and talking about one of our favorite traditions: Halloween.
ReplyDeleteFAE ~
ReplyDeleteLast night, I learned how to access my favorite blogs from work, so I was able to read your words "on the clock". But images and videos are still unavailable to me until I get home.
I don't need to tell you how I feel about certain traditions, how I feel about "Feminism", etc. Suffice to say that you and I are on the same page.
Traditions are vital. And some traditions can be tweaked over time, to suit new needs (just as the U.S. Constitution lays out a way by which future generations can legally alter it to meet needs unimagined by the Constitution's creators), but what God commands us to do should be a tradition unchanged forever in "this world".
>>... Now a lot of you are probably thinking that I’m confusing TRADITION with RELIGION, but let’s face it, especially to the non-believers, religion is little more than tradition, unless of course, they want to use it as a weapon against the believers.
Ain't no "dumb blonde" hereabouts!
I've seen 'FIDDLER ON THE ROOF' twice, and I really like it, but I don't know it well enough and I would not have thought to utilize it in this "traditionalism" context. Pretty damned "genius" for someone who often seems like she wants to convince us she's a "dumb blonde".
Anyway... this was great. I hope a certain "commenter" sees it. But if she does, she'll probably be aghast to learn that you're "THAT" kind of "traditionalist". How DARE you?!
You may ask, "How did this tradition get started?" I'll tell you. ...I don't know. ...BUT, it's a TRADITION!
I literally laughed out loud. (There's too much I've forgotten about this movie.)
~ D-FensDogg
'Loyal American Underground'
Kim - You have brought up a good point. I too miss some of those traditional 'holiday program'. Every year around Thanksgiving I used to watch 'The Wizard of Oz', along with the Charlie Brown series. It was fun to watch and then talk with my friends about it because, as you said; 'we were all really watching together'. Fun traditions that probably won't return.
ReplyDeleteMr. McCarthy - What a lovely comment. It certainly was well worth the wait. Now, you and I both know I don't really think I'm a 'dumb blonde' but something I do REAL dumb blonde things. I find it better to beat my readers to the punch, by admitting right out loud that I do 'have my moments'.
ReplyDeleteI believe parents as the primary role models and tradition are important. I opted to stay home with our son. And while it makes our finances tight, we can do without the fancy stuff for the sake of our son. He's happy, healthy, smart, and well mannered. I wouldn't give up all the time with him for the world.
ReplyDeleteWe also have dinner together. I had that growing up (stopped when I was a teenager), but it's a wonderful time to connect. My family used to go on hikes together too. As often as we can, we do that with our son.
Long live tradition...good ones that is. There are some traditions I don't like - like women being chattles in some countries living in the Middle Ages, but I love good traditions like families eating together, celebrating holidays together, passing on good books to each other...etc. I even run a bloghop in December each year, highlighting holiday traditions in cultures around the world.
ReplyDeleteDenise
>>... I don't think I could ever go to Korea, North or South as I've recently learned that the people there don not know how to pronounce the number 'five' correctly.
ReplyDeleteHA! I got it.
"There's a v in five".
It's not "fie"!
~ D-FensDogg
'Loyal American Underground'
Denise - couldn't agree more. Your Bloghop sounds like fun. I'll try to participate.
ReplyDeleteSTMc - I knew you would, but I'm surprised you found that.
ReplyDeleteI am pretty traditional in my thinking. In fact the community in which I live is called "Traditions" and I feel good about that name. One of my favorite family traditions is getting together at Christmas. It's more difficult to do in recent years but we try best we can.
ReplyDeleteTraditional roles do make sense for reasons mentioned in comments above. Can't add much to that.
I'm finding I can get a lot of topic mileage out of the BOTB posts. You carried this on great. Maybe we can start a tradition.
Lee
Tossing It Out
Lee - I hadn't originally planned to, but this post is leading up to my BOTB post for this Friday (already written and ready to go - how very unlike me).
ReplyDeleteIn the end I should really THANK that person who set me off on this 'tradition' rant.
I have no problem with your take on traditions but I would make a comment on the two income family. My son and his wife both work outside the home full time. They don't do it to afford the latest X-box. They do it to afford the house payment and the grocery bills and their special needs daughter's medication. Be careful not to paint people with too broad a brush.
ReplyDeleteLD - Thus post, as with all of my yakking, isn't intended to paint ANYONE other than MYSELF in any particular light. Everyone has ti make their own decisions based. In the circumstances(that only they would know) of their own lives.
ReplyDeleteChristine - Sorry I missed you comment earlier. I applause your commitment to your family. Just think had you not opted to be a stay at home mom, maybe we all wouldn't be enjoyIng your writing
ReplyDeleteI'm excited to see and hear some Fiddler on the Roof! Woohoo. Thank you.
ReplyDeleteAs far as tradition, as long as sexism and other isms don't dictate societal norms, I'm all for it.
xoRobyn
It's hard for me to wade in to these discussions because I'm a traditionalist myself. I don't want to foist my opinions or traditions on anyone, so I do kinda get upset with the latest trends of mocking everything that's come before (yea, yea, I'll bet they did that even in Ancient Rome. But still). Making fun of someone for holding traditional (or, okay, religious) beliefs doesn't make that person better than the other (or vice versa).
ReplyDeleteCan't we all just get along? :-)